👋 Welcome..
..to The Tap-Inn. Where you can tap in to the world of soccer with me, your first-gen Irish Tap-Inn bartender, Joe.
There’s two things I love serving in my bar. Ice cold beer and soccer wisdom.
I’m not talking like I’ve just ingested a coach’s manual, I’m speaking plain English - like a regular Joe. A short visit to The Tap-Inn will have you sounding like a pro.
Ready? I thought so. Let’s pour.
🥃 This Week’s Pour: Penalties, Explained
An uninterupted shot from 12 yards out. How could you miss?
Pretty easily, actually. On average, only 78% of penalties are scored — pressure gets to even the best players in soccer. But not me, never missed a pressure-pen in my life. Pressure’s for kegs.
‘Okay, Joe, we believe you. But how do penalties actually work?’
A penalty is awarded when a foul happens inside the penalty area
It’s one player vs the goalkeeper
The ball is placed 12 yards from goal on the penalty mark
All other players must be outside the penalty area and arc
☝️ Top shelf tip:
Goalkeepers must have at least one foot on or above the goal line when the penalty kick is taken. If they have left the line before the ball is kicked and save the penalty, the penalty taker will have a chance to take their kick again.
📺 This week in soccer
Premier League Round-Up
Spare a thought for Liverpool fans. A late, late Chelsea goal from Brazilian wonderkid Estêvão means it’s three defeats in a row for the first time under reds coach Arne Slot. Arsenal’s 3 pts at home to West Ham means they’re the new league leaders.
Chelsea 2-1 Liverpool | Arsenal 2-0 West Ham | Man Utd 2-0 Sunderland |
Brentford 0-1 Man City | Leeds Utd 1-2 Spurs | Everton 2-1 Crystal Palace |
USMNT face-off in Serie A
A 53rd-minute missed penalty from Christian Pulisic meant that the points were shared in a forgettable 0-0 in Turin on Sunday. Weston McKennie will be hoping for a better result for his Juventus outfit after the international break - it’s now 5 draws in a row for The Old Lady. Yes, The Old Lady is Juventus’ nickname.
Elsewhere, Hawaii-born 18-year-old Noahki Banks bagged his first goal for Augsburg in the German Bundesliga. “It was such a special afternoon for me”, he beamed after the game, “my whole family was here, even my grandma”. Alright enough with the old ladies, fellas.
📝 Pub Quiz
Who has scored more penalties in their career?
Scroll to the end for the answer.
🏆 World Cup Tracker: 249 Days to Go
Meet Trionda — the shiny new World Cup ball — complete with built-in accelerometers and gyroscopes to help the the refs make better and quicker decisons. (I have no idea what accelerometers and gyroscopes are either - I’m just a bartender).
But I do know this ball has got data on tap, an iconic design blending colours of all three host nations and it’s round. That’ll do nicely.
🧠 Quickfire
On This Day:
October 6th 2001: David Beckham curls in a last-gasp free kick vs. Greece at Old Trafford to make it 2-2, securing England’s automatic qualification for the 2002 World Cup. Big player, big moment.
Stat of the Week:
33: The new record number of English players who have appeared in top European soccer leagues of France, Germany, Spain and Italy this season. Brexit means Brexit the Brits will head abroad more?
Sound like a pro:
But can they do it on a cold, wet night in Stoke?”.
Origin: Stoke City was a notoriously difficult (and wet) place to go in the English midlands in the late noughties.
Translation: The ultimate test of character. If you can do it there, you can do it anywhere.
📝 Pub Quiz Answer:
Ronaldo — He has scored 178 to Messi’s 111.
👋 Until Next Time…
Thanks for stopping by The Tap-Inn.
If you enjoyed this, forward it to that friend who knows nothing about soccer and help spread the good word.
I’ll be behind the bar every week, Monday and Friday, serving up soccer. Sláinte.
— Joe